bloody bollocks! Sunday, April 27, 2008 |
note to self: this will be your last entry until the end of the exams. and that is an order!
Hello. Welllll, there isn't much to know about me. In other words, don't ask. Hey, but if you really want to know, one word: psychopath.. Anyways... I'm just another one of those bloggers out there, blogging about how crappy life is, etc. Pathetic, is it not? Life.
Psychobabble. Just to pique your interest.
me: 10 random facts.
fucking arseholes... you're nothing. show me those snobbish faces again, and i vow i'll land a damn punch right on that hidung tinggi. bastards...
who do you think you are? you're just like us, the only differences are those long pants, tie and black shoes. i know, i know, it looks very cool... on some people. fat, tubby ones look just plain fat while the dorky snobby ones look pathetic.
i was a prefect once, so i knew how things worked. yes, i WAS a prefect. a stupid prefect. i still remember why i wanted to become one: because the uniforms looked cool. how naive, right? sigh. this is so embarrassing.
anyway, i thought it would be nice to be in charge too. i thought that for once, i would be someone who was looked up to. but of course, none of that sort happened. instead, i began to see the other side of the "cool".
NON-STOP MARCHING. CONCENTRATION CAMPS. 1000 PUSH-UPS for every single little mistake. STUPID STUDENTS who dont listen. STUPID SENIOR PREFECTS who i totally admired at first, but loathed in the end. the juniors were at the bottom of the caste system. and we were treated like shit. EVERYTHING wasnt what i expected it to be. i was crushed. what the hell was i putting myself through...?
i have to admit that as a prefect, i was very snobbish too. but i learnt that it all an act. it was all fake. i was forced to become someone i'm not. i do not like confronting people. i do not like telling them off and receiving a 'fuck off' in return. i did not like being a prefect at all. i'm not snobbish, get that? a lot of people say i look really snobbish, but i'm not a snob. well, maybe a teensy wee bit, but i'm nice if you were to know me better. (urm. correct me if i'm wrong on this issue. dont wanna make a fool out of myself. but i think it would be too late to prevent that anyway. lol)
and you know what the worst thing was? i dragged a friend along for the terror ride. i'm sorry, joel.
as always, there is the other 'worst' thing: the seniors. to those few who were nice and understanding, thank you. to the other fucktards, fuck off. they pushed us around, treating us like, as i have said before, SHIT. they were selfish, good-for-nothing morons. in every social system, the senior ones are supposed to help and guide the newbies, right? WRONG. in the prefect social system, the seniors dont give a damn about you. they scold you, they berate you, they degrade you. they undermine your self-esteem and confidence so much, you would feel like you deserved every single insult they threw at you. one of them even threatened to slap me. you nincompoop... i would have preferred a punch, thank you very much.
this entry is dedicated to the prefects who, today, were involved in the hair holocaust at school. i hate you guys and i always will. and for pete's sake, i just cut my hair yesterday dammit. it's either you're deaf or you're blind because you clearly didnt hear me and failed to obeserve that my hair was already so short. either way, you prefects are dickheads.
as for the school, i'm never sending my son(s) there. never. i dont think i'd be in malaysia anyway. the further away the better. there is virtually no freedom. none. nil. for instance, everytime ck and i DJ, we get screamed at. and then now we get our hair cut. i think the world seems to be against us. but it's for your own good, they say... well, i dont need you to know what's good for me...
...i can do that myself.
urgh. what a horrible waste of hair. all that hair-conditioning... for nothing! haha
what the hell...
well, as you all know, i'm fake. in photos, that is.
in real life, i have bad skin. in unreal life, i have GREAT skin!
as well as blue/green/you-name-the-colour eyes!
pathetic, isnt it?
i have come to realise something.
i need to set my priorities right.
sigh. this entry was inspired by my horrible results, probably my worst ever since i entered high school. so if i dont start studying now, i'm not going to be able to cut it for my mid-year examinations and SPM.
FYI, i wont be updating as often anymore. it breaks my heart to do this too, but... in this society of ours, examinations always come first. sad, isnt it?
spread the psycho, people.
beauty... is no longer what it used be.
being beautiful, means having:
is this what you would consider beautiful?
my teacher came in today, without any make-up. of course, it was kind of a shock. but then, i realised, she's still beautiful. she still radiated that aura of self-confidence. she didnt care. she didnt care that her lips were a weird shade of purplish-blue. she didnt care that her skin was patchy and skin tone uneven. she just didnt care.
our perception of beauty has been horribly, horribly compromised. we always look on the outside, no longer look on the inside.
"Oh my god. Look at that zit."
"She is SO fat, it's unbelieveable. HAHAHA..."
"I'm ugly."
no, you're not.
beautiful, means being beautiful on the inside.
you dont need to be skinny. nor tall. or have great skin. people will no longer look for that outer beauty once they see the inner beauty.
the video below clearly shows that the perfection we always long to have, was never ever there in the first place. so think about it, before you say how perfect those models always seem to be.
shine on, people. your spectrum of true colours... that's what we want in a rainbow.
i'm thinking of dressing up as a banana this year.
no, really. i'm serious.